Will Smith.
Subway owes this guy royalty dues for every ad they run.
We're especially big fans of Fresh Prince. Nick-at-Nite is our call to mass as we gather before the Altar of Flashing Lights and Talking Heads and take Communion in the electromagnetic waves and audio pulses that the Altar offers up as a virtual representation of our MacArthur, our JFK, our Neo.
Yet along comes Tom "Batshit Maniac Trapped in the Closet" Cruise and guides Our Fearless Leader off course through the vile spews of L. Ron Hubbard and his Dianetics bullshit.
Over the course of the past year, I had heard and read rumors of Mr. Smith converting to Scientology, attending meetings, and donating money to the "church," but I had just brushed it off as common celebrity tabloid banter.
But oh, what an unfortunate day today is. Will Smith has opened The New Village Academy in Calabasas, which is fine. The curriculum of this K-6 school is what bothers and, quite frankly, scares me. The curriculum is unique in that it takes a little bit from here and there - Montessori, development theory (AP Psych PhTW), etc. But take a look at the listing of "study technology."
The website defines "study technology" as "an educational model developed by L.R. Hubbard, study technology focuses on three principles. First is the use of “mass” (manipulatives and hands-on experiences) to foster understanding – children need to see and feel what they are learning about. Second is the attention to the “gradient,” which ensures sure students master one level before moving on to the next. Third is the “misunderstood word,” in which students master word definitions and are taught not to read past words they don’t know the meanings of in order to understand completely what they are reading and learning."
Prima facie, these actually don't sound so bad. The first point is basically that if a child is to learn about something, the child should be able to interact with the physical object in order to best learn about it. The second point is simply to follow an appropriate learning curve and ensure that the student is not left behind or hindered by the pace of the course. The third is that the student should never move past a word he or she does not understand because they won't understand the rest of the passage. Pretty fundamental things in elementary education, no?
No problem with the learning curve - that makes perfect sense to me. I do, however, have problems with the other two points.
Hubbard claims that, by not understanding a word in a sentence, the reader will be unable to fully understand the rest of the statement. However, many people are able to figure out or infer the general meaning or gist of an unknown word through the CONTEXT of the sentence, after which we can look up the word to figure out the exact definition of the word and save it in our memory banks for future reference. We don't need formal dictionary definitions of words in order to move through life, we need societal/contextual definitions in order to successful interact with others in our community and keep the society moving.
The second thorn, my point against the "lack of mass" as a barrier to learning...hold on to your hats.
Hubbard's claim as to why being unable to interact with objects is a barrier to learning:
"Definite physiological reactions occur when trying to educate a person in a subject without the object actually present or available. A student who encounters this barrier will feel squashed, bent, sort of spinny, sort of dead, bored and exasperated. He can wind up with his face feeling squashed, with headaches and with his stomach feeling funny. He can feel dizzy from time to time and very often his eyes will hurt. These reactions are quite common but are often attributed to poor lighting or studying too late at night or any number of other incorrect reasons. The real cause is lack of the mass of the subject one is studying."
Not touching Newton's penis while learning about gravity is just like drinking 23 beers in four minutes.
Funny, that. Sure, MCB lectures make my head spin every once in a while, but that's because Dan Portnoy is a terrible lecturer and the material is actually difficult to understand. I can assure you that not having my head stuck inside a woman's vagina while taking sex ed in middle school did not prevent me from learning as much about "vaginal insertion," "ejaculation," and "doggy style" as I possibly could. (I guess I also got dizzy once in a while, but for an entirely different reason, a reason much more logical and pleasurable.)
This is the crap that Will Smith's school is going to be teaching young, impressionable children? The reason why this actually scares me is because of cases like these. The amount of celebrity and money that the "church" attracts is incredible, and as they build A-list name connections and fill their wallets, their strength and reach grows greater. They're going after the children now. It's really no different than Big Tobacco going after the kids starting at a young age in order to instill brand recognition and guarantee a steady stream of money coming into the establishment for years to come. So hear me: SAVE THE YOUNGLINGS FROM THIS ATROCITY.
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