"Gullible" is TOTALLY in the dictionary

When it comes to April Fool's Day pranks, I've never been the successful aggressor. In middle school, you could probably find me hiding in the boys' bathroom, scared to initiate any human interaction lest they give me some terribly unfunny news like "your mother was in a car accident in the parking lot and both her legs are broken!" or "oh wait, just kidding, she actually has cancer." (You understand WHY I believed that car accident story - my mother is female, Chinese, and above the age of 60, which legally qualifies her as a road hazard, required by law to maintain an empty radius of 50 feet around the vehicle.) Of course, the jokes were always innocuous, released by a simple "April Fool's!" Unfortunately, by that point I would already be screaming and crying about which hospital my mother was in or how far the cancer had metastasized. The horrified look on those kids' faces were priceless, especially the always awkward, always embarrassing "holy crap, does his mother ACTUALLY have cancer?" look. Yeah, I didn't make many friends in middle school. Shut up.

NO MORE. This year's April Fools' Day will go down in my books as the Glorious Victorious. Since none of my students read this blog, I'm going to reveal my genius plan of action and you will revel in my glory. Tomorrow, I'm going to teach all my students incredibly wrong formulas and concepts. That way, when they come back to me in a week or two with tears on their faces and F's on all their tests, I'll clear the air with a jovial "April Fools! Haha, see, now wasn't that hilarious?"

I was BORN to be a mentor.